The top 20 things not to say to a cop when he pulls you over.

20. I can't reach my license unless you hold my beer.

19. Sorry officer, I didn't realize my radar detector wasn't plugged in.

18. Aren't you the guy from the villiage people?

17. Hey, you must have been doing 125 to keep up with me, good job.

16. I thought you had to be in relatively good physical shape to be a police officer.

15. I was going to be a cop, but I decided to finish high school instead.

14. Bad cop. No donut.

13. You're not going to check the trunk, are you?

12. Gee, that gut sure doesn't inspire confidence.

11. Didn't I see you get your butt kicked on cops?

10. Is it true that people become cops because they are too dumb to work at McDonalds?

9. I pay your salary

8. So uh, you on the take or what?

7. Gee officer, that's terrific. The last officer only gave me a warning.

6. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.

5. I was trying to keep up with traffic. Yes, I know there is no other cars around, that's how far they are ahead of me.

4. What do you mean have I been drinking? You are the trained specialist.

3. Well, when I reached down to pick up my bag of crack, my gun fell off of my lap and got lodged between the brake and the gas pedal, forcing me to speed out of control.

2. Hey, is that a 9mm? That's nothing compared to this 44 magnum.

1. Hey, can you give me another one of those full cavity searches?

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sweet rides sweet ice now we're rolling in style

Mcorsab:

 

6. Do you know why you pulled me over? Okay, just so one of us does.



1. Hey, can you give me another one of those full cavity searches?

iv said both of the above. oh and theres your handcuffs or mine or shall we just pretend

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heh some nice ones in there.. dont think the cops here would like any of them though :)

a copper pulled me over on friday and asked me if id been drinking so i said yes then he done a brethalizer test on me and he said well theres nothing showing up on the test so i said well i know ive only been drinking water and would you fucking beleve it he arresed me, cunt lol

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a cop pulled me over the other day coz i had a back light out, so i said sorry officer its a bad connection so i gave it a kick and the light came back on, then frustrated the cop went to the front of my car and he said with a grin u betta come and kick the front end of ya car to see if this months tax comes up too!! smug b******d!!!!

I got pulled up by the Tactical crime squad while driving my car...anyway long story short, they had to take photos of my car for there record's,
so I said to the cops

"which one of you guys is putting on the bikini and laying across the bonnet for the pics"
they took that well, they just laughed and said my friend would look good in one... my friend that was with me is a bloke.

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http://blownxy.spaces.live.com/

Years ago my bruv-in-laws mate was driving his Mk2 escort home while pissed.  He was driving too fast, clipped a kerb & ended up on his roof in the middle of a roundabout.

A copper arrived, bent down & said to him.  Hello Sir, have you been drinking? 

No, I'm a fucking stunt driver, he replied.  The copper laughed & left him to it! 

I doubt he'd get away with it these days though.

Tazmin:

Years ago my bruv-in-laws mate was driving his Mk2 escort home while pissed.  He was driving too fast, clipped a kerb & ended up on his roof in the middle of a roundabout.

A copper arrived, bent down & said to him.  Hello Sir, have you been drinking? 

No, I'm a fucking stunt driver, he replied.  The copper laughed & left him to it! 

I doubt he'd get away with it these days though.

 

ahahaha

Thats gold

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http://blownxy.spaces.live.com/

now a day he would have been dragged out the window smack with a night stcik shot with a tazer and then left in the road while they put an impound marker on the car and tow it by its roof. lol

great get outta jail card hehe

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sweet rides sweet ice now we're rolling in style

mitsubishi-evo:

a copper pulled me over on friday and asked me if id been drinking so i said yes then he done a brethalizer test on me and he said well theres nothing showing up on the test so i said well i know ive only been drinking water and would you fucking beleve it he arresed me, cunt lol

hahaha, you were asking for it LOL

 

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If at first you don't suceed...Destroy all evidence you tried! - Good On Ya Chap

I have a hand written letter of apology from the local chief of police displayed proudly in my loo at home !!!  . a good few years ago when the traffic division used the omega cars , i got pulled over one night for a bit of sideways slipping round a roundabout ( i tried explaining it was slippy with diesel  ) in my MK 1 escort and got a ticket to the police mans ball , a few points and a nice fine.

As the fucker pulled out and passed me i noticed he had a tail light out , so being an honest law abiding citizen , i flashed him and got him to stop !!!! i asked if he still had the onboard computer that does all the light checks and it did , so i asked was he a lazy fucker or above the law ( did not go down well ) and ended with bed and breakfast for the pleasure.

Upon release i contacted a solicitor a took a civil suit against the fucker and ........YEP i beat the system !!!! and was given a commendation for service to my community !!!  as well as getting a handwritten apology from the traffic officer and the chief in command to express his sincere apologies for the attitude of his staff !!!   

I was spotted 2 weeks later , going round the same roundabout and slipping on the same diesel and the fucker kept driving !!!!!  just shows you that you can beat the system.